حالات English

People say nothing is impossible, but I do nothing every day.

I would challenge you to a battle of wits, but I see you are unarmed.

Patience is something you admire in the driver behind you, but not in the one ahead.

I'm great in bed; I can sleep for days.

I put the pro in procrastinate.

Etc. End of Thinking Capacity.

We live in the era of smart phones and stupid people.

It's all fun and games, until someone calls the cops. Then it's a new game; hide and seek.

If your life is all about screwing things and getting hammered, then congratulations, you're a tool.

We kill people who kill people because killing people is wrong.

I'm gonna go take a hot shower. It's like a normal shower, but with me in it.

My life is all math. I am trying to add to my income, subtract from my weight, divide my time, and avoid multiplying.

It's useless to hold a person to anything they say when they are in love, drunk, or running for office.

Just remember, if the world didn't suck, we'd all fall off.

If she were a president, she'd be Baberham Lincoln.

Of course I'm not perfect; there's a crack in my ass!

I have enough money to live comfortably for the rest of my life; if I die next Tuesday.

Be the kind of woman that when your feet hit the floor each morning, the devil says, Oh crap, she's up.

Silence is golden; duct tape is silver.

I'm so broke, I can't even pay attention.